Well, I'm now ten days into my non-smoking journey. It has had it's ups and downs, that's for certain. I still don't know if I'm ready to do this. Everyone says that you really have to want to quit in order for it to work. I guess I'm not really sure that I do want to quit. These are 2 things that I know for sure:
1. I have been feeling much better since I quit.
2. It has become very expensive to be a smoker.
On the other hand...
1. I really enjoy smoking.
Hmmm...yep, that's all I've got. There are numerous other reasons why I should continue quitting besides the two I have mentioned. Those are just the top 2 for me. However, the one reason to smoke, is the only reason I can think of.
I have taken 4 drags of other people's cigarettes since I have quit. The first 3 were off the same cigarette. I tricked one of my friends to give me a couple (he didn't know I've been trying to quit). It actually gave me such a buzz that I felt sick. It really didn't taste good at all. It kind of grossed me out actually. But it felt sooo good!
That's what's so terrible about these things! There is nothing good about them! They smell gross, they taste gross, they make you feel gross, they make your insides look gross, they make your bank account look gross, they make other people think you're gross, and the list goes on and on... But...they make me comfortable. And it feels terribly uncomfortable to not have them in my life anymore.
I'm very thankful that the nicotine patches work as well as they do. I'm dealing with enough of an emotional termoil right now, I don't need the physical habit to contend with as well. I can deal with that part 7 weeks from now when I'm suppose to stop using the patch. Hopefully, my emotions will be more in check at that time. Only time will tell. In the meantime, here's a funny little cartoon from the Toothpaste for Dinner website: